HOW I GET LAID?

ask ducis that nigga is a PIMP

It's quite simple, really.


Step 1: In order to get laid tonight, you first need to see if this is possible for you. Assess how you stack up on the social ladder. How many attractive female friends do you have? How many cool, attractive male friends do you have?

Step 2: You do not have any attractive female friends and acquaintances? That's fine. Most average men don't, but most men who get laid do. You actually need to invest effort into building a huge circle of female friends. Solution: Join all the social clubs and organizations that you can and start getting a cool, social life with plenty of female friends.

Step 3: You do have the pre-requisites to getting laid tonight? Here's how to get laid tonight. Go to a social gathering and start "working the room". Just talk to and introduce yourself to everyone there. Be charming, funny and respectful and people will love you! Just keep moving from group to group... until you've charmed everyone there.

Step 4: As the night progresses and you have befriended most of the people (and women) in the place... some of the women you had talked to to will start becoming more flirtatious and perhaps even "touchy-feely" with you. These are the women that are looking to get laid.

Step 5: Of the ones who have displayed this increased interest and signs that they want to get laid - pick the one you like best, and then invent an excuse for the two of you to move to a more intimate space. If this is a party it can be something like "Woah, it's so loud in here, let's continue this conversation over here" [as you take her and lead her by the hand to an empty -get laid- room]

Step 6: If this is in a club or some other environment, it's usually something like: "let me show you my [whatever you were talking about]", and lead her to your apartment". The rest is automatic. She'll do the rest.


How someone cannot accomplish this task is beyond me.

Namclone's/Ducis' fail-safe steps to get laid

Step 1: Write in your diary.

Step 2: When girl comes in, quickly stash it away. Make it obvious so she can see but not too obvious.

Step 3: When girl asks "what cha writing about?" whimsically say "oh nothing" with a playful smile but also look deep like you're a thinker. Wink if you want to charm her even more.

Step 4: Say "yes" when she asks if you want to get laid.