Show Posts
This section allows you to view all posts made by this member. Note that you can only see posts made in areas you currently have access to.
Messages - Classic Meepington
# 4366
The plot twist was expected but WINNER.
# 4367
# 4368
# 4369
It's just a ripoff of Resistance, don't buy it. And also lol at Hunters scoring higher.
# 4370
I woke up on the floor, my mature games such as Manhunt, Ridge Racer and Genji nestled beside me. All seemed well, but for some reason I knew today was no ordinary day, in fact it was going to be a very mature day. I arose from my floor and dropkicked deodorant and clothes onto myself after my lava shower had finished. I then had a real life mature hot coffee minigame with some chick walking past my house. I hijacked some dicks' car in a mature fashion and proceeded to the Electronics Boutique to purchase a new mature game for my Sony Playstation 3 which I named Kaz Hirai and spoon all night long.
I arrived at the store which housed the AAA Mature Manhunt 2 I was about to have possession of. I walked through the doors which were too kiddy and retarded and gay to open automatically in my presence, not a scratch on my shirtless muscular body. I casually walked over to the mature (PS3) section and browsed over all the excellent games on display. A minute or so later the doors opened and two kids of about 15 and 13 years of age entered the store and walked over to the gay/kiddy/immature/Wii section which happened to be right beside the PS3 section. As they salivated over the thought of unicorning an Italian plumber I simply ignored their pussiness as I don't like to waste my time with such foolish "games".
Just then I overheard one of them murmur how Mario could "beat" Kratos from God of War. My orgasm of touching PS3 games halted immediately. I turned around stared at the child who uttered such a phrase. "Beat at what?" I inquired angrily at his naive quip. "In like a fight I guess" squeaked the scrawny asshole with legs. My muscles inflated to their full size like me getting an erection while playing Resistance. "Wrong answer MOTHERfetchER" I bellowed as I held him over my head and then thrashed him down on his friend. He had time to get up before I unleashed an uppercut to him sending him tumbling back down onto his friend. I gave them a few seconds to recover and apologize to me and Sony for insulting them, but they would do no such thing. They shakily stood up, a few of the bones visibly broken and trembled backwards in respect. "Well, what now bitches?" The veins in my arms were jutting out like razor blades as I started beating them once more. BLOOD. WAS. EVERYWHERE.
Then they just lay there, ready to die. I took a hueg dump in each of their mouths. It was over, I had eradicated the ignorant kiddies. Just then one of the store clerks who had witnessed the entire thing started a slow clap. I stood up proudly as other employees and customers joined him. Soon the entire room was clapping and shouting and gathered around me. I waded my way to the counter, ready to finally make my purchase. The manager stood at the counter proudly as I approached. "Can I help you majesty?" he questioned meekly. "I'll have Manhunt 2" I responded, my voice like a loud and manly echo through the grand canyon, my pubes extended at a gaping full 2 feet in all directions. The manager grew a rather bulbous erection as he explained that Manhunt 2 was not even in stores yet. I asked him again and he produced an unreleased copy and bowed down as he said "would you like the maturity guarantee with that?" I of course said "yes" and paid him in a manly slap of my ginormous dong across his face. As I grasped Manhunt 2 firmly in my hands the crowd cheered and lifted me on their shoulders as we marched out the front doors.
Outside was different. Everyone was mature. The streets were paved with PS3s, there was a parade and an airshow for me among other extravagant performances. My balls suddenly tingled like the tingling I get whenever I caress myself with my sixaxis. They had turned into 2 glowing PSPs. I then played with my balls and beat every PSP game ever and orgasmed with many Playstations and Kaz Hirai.
The End. (btw its all true)
I arrived at the store which housed the AAA Mature Manhunt 2 I was about to have possession of. I walked through the doors which were too kiddy and retarded and gay to open automatically in my presence, not a scratch on my shirtless muscular body. I casually walked over to the mature (PS3) section and browsed over all the excellent games on display. A minute or so later the doors opened and two kids of about 15 and 13 years of age entered the store and walked over to the gay/kiddy/immature/Wii section which happened to be right beside the PS3 section. As they salivated over the thought of unicorning an Italian plumber I simply ignored their pussiness as I don't like to waste my time with such foolish "games".
Just then I overheard one of them murmur how Mario could "beat" Kratos from God of War. My orgasm of touching PS3 games halted immediately. I turned around stared at the child who uttered such a phrase. "Beat at what?" I inquired angrily at his naive quip. "In like a fight I guess" squeaked the scrawny asshole with legs. My muscles inflated to their full size like me getting an erection while playing Resistance. "Wrong answer MOTHERfetchER" I bellowed as I held him over my head and then thrashed him down on his friend. He had time to get up before I unleashed an uppercut to him sending him tumbling back down onto his friend. I gave them a few seconds to recover and apologize to me and Sony for insulting them, but they would do no such thing. They shakily stood up, a few of the bones visibly broken and trembled backwards in respect. "Well, what now bitches?" The veins in my arms were jutting out like razor blades as I started beating them once more. BLOOD. WAS. EVERYWHERE.
Then they just lay there, ready to die. I took a hueg dump in each of their mouths. It was over, I had eradicated the ignorant kiddies. Just then one of the store clerks who had witnessed the entire thing started a slow clap. I stood up proudly as other employees and customers joined him. Soon the entire room was clapping and shouting and gathered around me. I waded my way to the counter, ready to finally make my purchase. The manager stood at the counter proudly as I approached. "Can I help you majesty?" he questioned meekly. "I'll have Manhunt 2" I responded, my voice like a loud and manly echo through the grand canyon, my pubes extended at a gaping full 2 feet in all directions. The manager grew a rather bulbous erection as he explained that Manhunt 2 was not even in stores yet. I asked him again and he produced an unreleased copy and bowed down as he said "would you like the maturity guarantee with that?" I of course said "yes" and paid him in a manly slap of my ginormous dong across his face. As I grasped Manhunt 2 firmly in my hands the crowd cheered and lifted me on their shoulders as we marched out the front doors.
Outside was different. Everyone was mature. The streets were paved with PS3s, there was a parade and an airshow for me among other extravagant performances. My balls suddenly tingled like the tingling I get whenever I caress myself with my sixaxis. They had turned into 2 glowing PSPs. I then played with my balls and beat every PSP game ever and orgasmed with many Playstations and Kaz Hirai.
The End. (btw its all true)
# 4371
:ɟoopιq:
# 4372
YOU'RE WINNER!
# 4373
10/10 would read again also how big are you're boobs?
# 4374
:text:
# 4375
lol marketing
# 4376
More like every copy of BROTRR you get to play in heaven.
# 4377
# 4378
And by QFT you mean Quit fetching Trolling?
# 4379
*anti-sign*
You want us to play the greatest game ever in purposely low resolution at 2 fps with dildo waggle controls? No thanks.
# 4380
It's all about da games bay-bee.